Baby Got Back Awesomeness

If you have been reading this blog for awhile, or know me in the flesh, you probably know of my unshakable love for Baby Got Back (and Justin Timberlake's nonsense, but that's another story). So you will understand the giggle fit that ensued when I watched this elegant and lovely wedding first dance to Sir Mix-a-lot's classic work.

Also, if you know me in real life, you will understand that David and I would not have to work out pre-set choreography to this particular ditty. We've got that sh*t in our souls.

Thanks to Reim for the heads up.

Ginnifer Goodwin, The One 'Celeb' In The Practical Club

I think that our obsession with celebrity weddings are part of what is slowly destroying our weddings and our sanity. Do I even need to qualify this? Can't I just say: Eva Longoria & Tony Parker, and TomKat? Right. Done.

I picked up my new Modern Bride (yes, I now have a subscription, thanks to a hilarious gift from our friends Kory & Beck) and flipped through it to see a page called "Celebs' Favorite Weddings." Of course most 'celebs' interviewed said their favorite wedding was their very own, as it was the most ostentatious they had ever attended. But there in the middle of the page was the adorable Ginnifer Goodwin, who said "At my favorite wedding, the guests sat on lawn chairs, and the bridesmaids wore what they wanted to wear. There was a buffet instead of a sit-down dinner, and we danced under the trees. I had the time of my life." Awwww.... now I love Ms. Goodwin even more!

Of course a few pages later, the new Mrs. Charlie Sheen explained that because she wanted her wedding to feel more like it had taken place in a backyard, she had large potted trees brought inside the expensive estate they rented for their wedding.

And then my head exploded.

Nole & Andrews Budget Garden Wedding

Style Me Pretty posted such a beautiful $13,000 garden wedding this week, that I just had to post some additional images, in case you missed seeing it. I never cease to be inspired by the thrifty and creative choices that couples planning weddings on tight budgets make. So often they end up making more interesting choices then you see in the average big budget wedding. Necessity is indeed the mother of invention.
A homemade table runner, which is our plan as well.
The bride had a stunning bouquet of lilacs, and wore a used designer dress from Preownedweddingdresses. The great thing about used wedding dresses? It's not like its been worn more then once!
A cake buffet! The practical alternative to the overpriced wedding cake dilemma.
Also, Style Me Pretty has launched a site re-design, and it now has a budget beautiful wedding section, along with a Do-It-Yourself Inspired wedding section. Go browse, it's awesome.

All pictures by Puma Bean Photography via Nole's Knot Bio.

Mission Accomplished

A few reasons why you practical wedding readers (or "Team Practical" as I call you in my head) are awesome:

1. You just are, obviously. You leave the best comments, and send me the most supportive emails. You're positive and helpful, and give such constructive tips and feedback. Half the time the comments here are better then my posts.
2. Thus far you've raised $135 for Dianne & Chuck's $10,000 wedding in reverse. Can we make it $200? Lets see!
3. You brought The Engaged Guy out of his slumber. I told you, peer pressure works. Check out his post on the subject here.* And please disregard him calling me famous (it made me blush).

Go, go, Team Practical!

*Ohdearjesus. While you are over there, please listen to the podcast of the post. The auto voice reading the post is so awful-hilarious, it made me actually cry a little bit from the laughing. Perhaps we should start the podcast nonsense here?

Light Up The Night - A $10,000 Wedding In Reverse

I thought we'd end the week on a sweet note. This wedding is the perfect antidote for feeling burned out by all of the spend, spend, spend associated with the modern wedding. Dianne and Chuck met online, and had only been dating a few months when she was diagnosed with stage IV lymphoma. When she told Chuck that it he should run away he told her "When God gives you a gift, you don't give it back," and proposed to her at her hospital bedside.

Which brings us to the upcoming nuptials. The couple is getting married in their backyard, and the next night they are asking all of their wedding guests to walk with them at the Leukemia and Lymphoma society's annual Light the Night Walk. Their goal is to raise $10,000 for blood cancer research with their wedding, instead of spending $10,000 on their wedding.

In the midst of the intense narcissism that sometimes surrounds weddings, this story is so refreshing, and touching. It reminds us to be careful and thoughtful about how we spend our wedding dollars, because the money we spend on our wedding is very real money that we should be using to make a small difference in the world, whether that is supporting vendors we like and trust, or starting our marriage with this kind of profound tzedakah. You can give a donation to Dianne and Chuck's goal, here, if you feel so moved (remember teeny tiny donations help too). Think of it as a small rebellion against the madness of the wedding industry.

Best of luck to Dianne and Chuck! They have promised to update us after the wedding, and I for one am rooting for them.

Photo via Apaoli's Flickr stream

My New Style Board

I'm always a little shy about posting my inspiration boards, because I just make boards for myself, not lovely works of art like Abby and Kathryn. But, I created this new board for our wedding, to give people a idea of our ideas for our jewel toned, vintage-y, laid back, joyful wedding day. This board had a little more pink then we want to use, but it gives the vibrant feeling we are going for. You can see my first board here, which contains lots of elements we are still planning on using.

Your Mission (Should You Choose To Accept It)

Ok, so we've talked before about the pathetic status of grooms at weddings. They are supposed to show up, shut up, and pay up, as far as I can tell. And most things on the internet written for (or even by) grooms reads like it's written for barely literate frat boys* - people I don't even want to have a drink with, let alone spend the rest of my life around. Because seriously, if your groom only cares about bachelor parties, lingerie, cigars, honeymoons, and drinking, you need to leave him by the side of the road. Now.

So into this black hole of groom nothingness, steps The Engaged Guy. He's the blogger my fiancé would be, if my fiancé blogged about weddings (well, except for the skinny ties thing. David wants you to know that he holds no truck with skinny ties). He's hilarious, he's smart, his fiancé and wedding sound amazing, and he's a professional writer. I know you've heard about this blog before, but I have been to his site, and there are almost no comments. So, you clever and funny Practical Wedding readers, hie yourself to The Engaged Guy, and pepper him with your comments. Perhaps we can peer-pressure him into posting more often? Peer pressure is awesome.

*I recently learned that the term "frat" is offensive to some people. If this is true for you, my apologies. Please substitute the term "fraternal brotherhood."

Brooke & Tim's Musical Summer Camp Wedding

I've been in love with this beautiful carefree summer camp wedding for a few weeks, and I'm excited to finally get to share it with you. Summer camp and other more rural wedding locations are practical in some areas, and not so practical in others. We made some calls to rural venues, and a woman told me "Our rental fee is reasonable. But, please keep in mind that you'll need to rent all your own generators, rent toilets, set up lighting, bring in water, rent shuttles, and pave the roads leading to the the site." Or whatever. And I thought, "Lady, you lost me at generators."

But this wedding, ohhh, this wedding. Shot by the wizards at Belathee Photography, it took place at Camp Collins in Gresham, Oregon. It's rustic, it's casual, its sassy, it's hip. I'm in love. All you couples who live in areas with practical summer camps, run with this!
Sassy wedding guests always seem to make a wedding. Good thing we have awesome friends!

I love big groom shots at weddings, and this shot is really great. Everyone looks like they are having so much fun. It looks, well, like summer camp. We are definitely doing a group shot, and we are thinking of setting up a little photography backdrop like this one.
There was lots and lots of music at this wedding. I used to go to world music and dance camps in the Redwoods in California... or magical musical hippy festivals, if you want a translation. The vibe of this wedding reminds me of dance camp, and makes me want to run away to the redwoods to get my bellydance on right NOW! (Note to self: get some kick *ss musicians to party at our wedding.)

What makes the wedding for me is this picture of the bride and groom. We all know I'm pretty picky in the wedding dress department, but this fits the bill. Simple, lovely, and pre-rumpled so you can party, party, party!

Belathee Photography shoots in New York, Seattle, and San Francisco. My kind of girls!

Imperfect Weddings

If you still believe in perfection, you are too young to get married. Nothing in life is perfect, especially a big party. But even if we don't believe in perfection, we are all being force fed this idea that our wedding day will be perfect. Everyone talks to you about "Your Big Day" "Your Perfect Day" "The Happiest Day of Your Life." The problem with these ideas are that they stress you out. Since brides are told to expect and require perfection, and that all the details matter, that often translates into a huge amount of stress. I've seen brides waiting to go down the aisle in full freak out mode over one detail or another. I read about a bride who didn't enjoy her wedding day at all, because after all her planning, her $10,000 gown ripped, and even after some safety pin intervention, she couldn't enjoy the rest of the day. And I think we can all agree, we don't want that to happen to us.

So, what to do? Things are going to go wrong on our wedding days, and we need to expect that. Our Labor of Love posted pictures of this adorable bride, who was in a cast on her wedding day. Instead of ruining the day, it made for great pictures, and gave the couples stories they will tell for the rest of their lives. She was carried down the aisle on a chase lounge, holding her dad's hand, and her new husband carried her back down the aisle.

When you start asking around, everyone has a story of something that went wrong on their wedding day. My parents had all red and white flowers for their wedding... except for the floral cake topper which the florist inexplicably made out of bright yellow roses. During our friends wedding the grooms 11 year old brother and groomsman fainted during the service because he was locking his knees to stand "extra tall." I went to a wedding where the DJ started narrating the brides every move "The bride picked up a wine glass! The bride kissed the groom!" And my mom turned to me and said, "Boy is this going to make a great story one day." These crazy mistakes didn't ruin the weddings. They added imperfection to joyful days celebrating wonderful, but imperfect relationships.

Maybe we should think of whatever goes wrong on our wedding days as lucky. Maybe we should start telling brides to "break a leg" on their wedding day. It would be healthier then wishing them the happiest day of their life.
Photos via Our Labor Of Love (my photo crush out of Atlanta).

Guest Blogging At Snippet And Ink

I'm super excited to announce that I'm guest blogging over at Snippet and Ink all day today. I'm a huge fan of Kathryn's work, and I was terribly flattered when she asked me to guest post. I'm posting my top practical wedding tips throughout the day, so go check it out, and chime in to the discussion.

My New Header!

I'm super excited about my new header! It was drawn by my friend Gina* who has been drawing cartoons with me in them for more then a decade now. Who would have thought that one day she'd be drawing me in a wedding dress for my wedding website? (Answer: probably Gina. She's oddly clairvoyant like that). As I'm sure you can imagine, I love both drawings very much, but I love this picture of me, frazzled by the wedding industry, the very best. If you look closely, bobby pins are popping right out of my bun because I am SO FREAKED OUT by all the things I'm being told I MUST have and all the money I MUST spend to get married.

Also, I really do look like this.

*Gina is launching a awesome and hilarious T-shirt site soon, and I'll tell you about that when it goes live.

Kara & John's Simple Sassy Wedding

One of the very best things about writing this blog is getting to see cool inspiring weddings that are not over the top, are really simple, and emotionally honest. This wedding was sent to be by a reader, Allison, as a great example of a practical wedding. It was shot by the amazing A Bryan Photo, based out of Birmingham, Alabama.
The thing I love the most about this wedding is the couples easy way with each other. They are so in love, but not any a sappy posed way. They both seem totally in their comfort zone at the wedding, which is so important. Other things I love: the brides dress (which looks like a bridesmaid dress in white to me!), and her awesome wild flower bouquet.
You so rarely see touching shots of male friendship from weddings (or really, shots of men at weddings) and this picture just captured my heart.
I love it all, but it was this picture which sold me. The bride walked herself down the aisle!
A simple outdoor ceremony.
Look. I'm going to admit this. I'm a sucker for a cute baby. Period. And you know I'm a "as many kids as possible at the wedding" kind of girl.
David describes my flower style as "bunches of wild flowers" so clearly, I love this bouquet.
For all of you feeling tense about the current obsession with wedding details, and wondering if your wedding will live up in every little way, please note! They are toasting with plastic cups! And the wedding is super excellent.
Homemade cake! Yumm! Best part about this cake? It's not towering and covered with perfect sugar impressions of the lace of the brides dress, and a diamond monogrammed topper, but unlike those cakes, it looks good enough to eat. And it makes me so happy that someone made the cake just for them!
A wedding tradition that has gone out of style, and I really miss. The bride and the groom changing into traveling clothes, and heading off to their honeymoon and married life!

Look at all of the photos over here. There were so many great ones I couldn't fit in the post, that will make you grin. Thanks for the tip Allison!

A Call For URL's

As you might have noticed, I am less then excellent about updating my blog roll. Blogging is a joy for me, but I tend to squeeze in my writing to small quiet moments in my busy days, so blog rolls and small details sometimes get overlooked. But! In the next few weeks, I want to start putting together a compendium of practical wedding brides and grooms*... a practical reader, if you will. So, all you budget savvy, crafty, and chic bloggers, if you'd like to be included, please leave me your URL in the comments.

Go team practical! (Now lets go save some money).

*un-engaged folks are of course welcome.

Dress Shopping, The Generic Edition

So, I finally swallowed my pride, along with some past bad experiences, and waltzed in the door to David's Bridal. I'm a bride trying to keep on a budget, after all, so pride is overrated. I was expecting everything in the store to be a sparkling, princess, A-line poof - and I was wrong. David's Bridal is in the business of creating designer knockoffs, and business is booming. I told them I was looking for long and lace, and off they trotted. They came back with a few dresses priced from $250 on up. One of them (from their "couture" collection) was $1000 and perfectly lovely. In case I wasn't picking up on the fact that this dress was COUTURE, it was called Monique Lou(huillier of course, was implied). I put on the dress, and I can absolutely tell you, it was a nice dress. Full stop. There was not a thing in the world wrong with it. I looked lovely in it, the lace was nice, I looked like a bride.

And yet, somehow, it left me with a empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. I looked like A BRIDE, ie, a dress up doll of a bride. I looked like a bride, but I didn't feel a thing like myself. My inner sass, I'm afraid, was completely muffled.

So here is the crux of the issue. I don't believe in wedding perfection. I don't think that you need to have some life changing transcendental "oh mommy" moment when you put on a dress. I have a great life, thanks, I don't need to find my moment of zen in a wedding dress store. But I do think that we each deserve to feel fabulous on our wedding day, and on my wedding day I would like to feel fully, absolutely, and radically like myself. And I'd rather wear a amazing cocktail dress then a beautiful wedding dress that doesn't feel a thing like me.

So, for gods sakes, you lucky brides with the dress in the closet, tell me there is hope (even if it does not live in David's Bridal.) And if you don't have a dress, you should try ye old David's Bridal. My neurosis should not stop your bargain shopping!

Picture: this homemade dress, this dress has sass. via Our Labor Of Love.

Much Needed Vacation!

I'm off for some southern California vacation. Sitting by the pool, walking on the beach, sleeping in, soaking up the sun, time with family, toasting David's brother's engagement.

I'll see you Monday. Lots of good stuff is coming your way next week, stay tuned.

Happy Fourth of July!

Photo from The Dancing Mermaid's flickr stream

Weddings On The Other Side Of The Pond

Things the British have right about weddings:

• They give the guests a opportunity to wear fabulous, stylish, over the top hats*
• No garter toss
• No cake smooshing on the face
• A proper sense of restraint and dignity
  

Now, I might be biased, given that my British cousins have had the coolest practical weddings of all time. They got married (respectively) at a lighthouse, a small castle, and a local parish church (which is hundreds of years old, of course) with a reception at the family sheep farm. Why can't we do that? Oh right. No castles or sheep farms. Gah!

So I have this to say to all you UK brides: keep the faith. Don't Americanize your wedding. It's just not worth it.
And I'm not even mentioning the other things the British have right, like tea made properly, marmalade, and London.

*Technically, these hats were worn at a Knighting. But I'll take that in a pinch.

Fun Affordable Wedding Gifts

Mighty Goods*, which is one of my favorite sites on the internet, has done it again. This excellent shopping blog (which is pretty much like having your own personal shopper, as far as I'm concerned) has just published a list of great wedding gifts under $40. It's excellent for wedding season, but also great if your looking for affordable things that you actually want to put on your registry. I'd be thrilled to get any of these things! They also has a top shelf guide up, filled with really unique liquor choices. Ostensibly, it was for fathers day gifts, but it's also good for the wedding gift shopping, I say. Who doesn't need a drink before they walk down the aisle?

*Totally not a sponsored ad, I actually love this site that much. David finds half my presents there. Check it out!

My Ring & Me

This is my new favorite picture of my engagement ring. I took it at the camera obscura down at Ocean Beach. That's the ocean twinkling off the diamond!

My engagement ring and me. We are having something of a tough time of it. David and I found my engagement ring in a antique store (you can read all about the search here), and the ring and I fell in love immediately. It was small and simple, and looked just right on my small hand. It dates from the 1920's, and is subtly art deco. It's unique, it has soul, and it fit perfectly on my hand without having to be sized. When I put it on, the store owner looked at the ring, and looked at me, and said, "Oh, that's your ring." And it was.

But we're having a little bit of a hard time out in the real world together. My ring is somewhat small, and it's simple. Meaning that it's absolutely not what is popular at the moment. Everyone around me seems to be competing in some sort of diamond Olympics. Rings as big as your knuckle! Rings that would feed a third world country for a year! Rings you can not possibly do the dishes in! And subtlety, I get reminded all the time that my ring is little. People look at my ring, and then look slightly disappointed. "It's from the 1920's!" I always rush to say, "It's vintage!" Friends tell me that they love my ring. It's so classy, and tasteful. They want one just like it, they say, but much bigger. "Oh." I say "I have small hands. I wanted one just this size."

But I've noticed that when I'm doing yoga, or at the camera obscura, or at the beach, my ring looks just right. It sparkles up at me and says "Here we are, and we're just right together." Hopefully soon I'll learn to tune out all the other nonsense.
(Also: If you are ever in San Francisco, you have to check out the camera obscura. It's one of the city's hidden gems, and dates back to Playland On The Beach in the 1920's. It costs $3 to get in, and I could meditate on it's ever moving images of the sea for hours.)

Honeymoon Clothes

So, since it's a holiday week here in the states I thought I'd post most some more frothy, slightly less practical goodness. I don't know about you, but I've been stressed out lately, and I need some stress relief!

Emily, over at Emily Style came up with the neat idea of buying some clothes and tucking them away for her honeymoon (they are going on a americana road trip). That way you have cute outfits for your honeymoon snapshots, and clothes you will look back fondly on as honeymoon clothes. So when I saw this dress, I immediately thought of it as a honeymoon dress.
Normally I don't go for a print quite this bold, but this dress says warm night dinner under the stars to me.
Plus, it's convertible! (seen here in black) Which means you can wear it multiple times and feel different and sassy each time. It's a knit, so it won't wrinkle in your bag.

Dress from Nordstrom. I know! It's $216 bucks, but I'm gearing up for vacation, my practical hat is on a little less firmly.

What To Do About Your Big-Day-Dreaming Mother

A few of you have emailed me with that timeless problem: I want one wedding, but my mother (or mother in law) wants another. Except your timeless problem has a twist. You want a simple, practical wedding, and your mother is insisting that it isn't proper to get married without a monogrammed aisle runner, at least five bridesmaids, a unity candle and unity sand, a cathedral length train, and fillet Mignon. What to do?

Well, I'm pleased to say that the answer to this problem couldn't be simpler. You need to go out and buy your mother a copy of Miss Manners On {Painfully Proper} Weddings. Read it yourself first, then wrap it up nicely, and give it to your mother as a sweet gift for helping you plan your wedding. Then, whenever questions come up, say, "Let's look at what Miss Manners says is proper. You know, just to be sure." And your work is done.

My friend Kate once described Miss Manners lovingly as "Our Trojan Horse." By which she meant that at her core Miss Manners is not only practical, she's progressive. But she's wrapped in the armor of etiquette, which translated just means "treating people properly," so not even the most stuck in the mud backwards thinking person can argue with her. When it comes to weddings though, Miss Manners is both my practical icon and my favorite humorist. How can you argue with a woman that said in a recent interview:

"Weddings have become meaningless and, not to say vulgar, and ostentatious. There's a huge industry promoting that. What drives me crazy is that they're always promoting expensive things under the name of, "It's proper to do this," or "People expect it." And they're the very things that are condemned by etiquette, which is not in the business of telling people to go into debt. But the ritual itself, if it could be hacked back to what it's supposed to be, can be very lovely."

So just in time for a holiday weekend I'm telling you, if your mother is stressing you out, go get her this book. And get one for yourself. It's hilarious. And there is not a monogrammed aisle runner in sight.

It's out of the bag now. Now you know my Practical Wedding secret.

A big thank you to Tara, for serendipitously sending me the Miss Manners article. Now go read it, and watch her cut those "weddings are a fantasy" people down to size.

Bridesmaid Gift: Like Sisters

Now that I've talked about the fact that I think expensive bridesmaid gifts are overrated, I'm going switch it up and show you my favorite bridesmaid gift of all time:
This necklace is inlaid with drops of silver representing the seven sisters constellation. For the girls that are like sisters to you. Awwww....

If you want to get them jewelry, get them something like this. Personal, handcrafted, lovely.

Sisterhood pendant by Blue Poppy Jewelry, another kick *ss idea via Mighty Goods.

Groom Guest Post: The Other Point of View

David here, the "better half" at chez practical. I have been asked, well maybe more persuasively requested, to write a guest blog from the other-gendered point-of-view. I've been racking my brain trying to come up with something to write for this first guest blog and decided that it may be best to use my insights into the male mind to aid you all along in the happiest day of YOUR life.

Which brings me to my point: It's not the happiest day in your life. There are many reasons for this. First, I hope to God, for the sake of each and every one of you, that your wedding does not end up being the happiest day in your life. Children, grandchildren, promotions, hell, even a great vacation - these should be the happiest days in your life. The point - they're well ahead of you, perhaps somewhere around the age of 45 (and if you ARE 45, let's say 75). Most importantly, though, and I know that the industry is myopically unaware of this fact, there is another person there: Your Groom (my apologies to my LGBT friends for this gendered post).

I know, sometimes he doesn't seem to be listening as you tell him about the great dress you just saw online. But let me just remind you that sometimes you do this in the middle of something he's watching on tv. But trust me, he's interested. But here's the sticky part, he's not interested in every detail. Think "He's just not into you", with "you" replaced by fill-in-the-blank (flowers, placecards, centerpieces). Let me repeat this for the back of the room, he's not interested. No, this doesn't mean he secretly-has-an-opinion-but-he-
is-afraid-to-say-it. I have this conversation all the time with Meg - sometimes my mind is a blank slate of opinion.** No amount of sitting down and reflecting on my feelings is going to change that. It's done. There's nothing there. Live with it.

But just because he's not interested in all the details, doesn't mean he doesn't care about the wedding reflecting both of your tastes. For example, I put down my foot: No Pastels! I can't stand the flowery, poofy, pastelly "romantic" look. And you know what? If I really can't stand it, it shouldn't be in the wedding. I want to be able to look back at pictures of my wedding day and think that the lack of pale blue/light pink color combinations was because it was OUR wedding, and not just my partner's.

So just like you need to sit down with your parents and ask them what they feel is important (because it's not just the collective YOUR day, it's partly their day too), ask your partner. If it's only one thing, your job is easy. If it's more, listen to the reasons. If there are no reasons, don't push. Sometimes there are no reasons. The male mind is one big Id sometimes, and that's ok.

**Note from Meg: It's just that I can't imagine not having a opinion about something. Heck, if I don't care, I make up a opinion just so I can have a point of view. One of the many reasons I'm a DELIGHT, I tell you!

Picture: What David secretly dreams our wedding will look like. Or did he say it was his nightmare? Can't remember. From here.

Wedding Sexism

Since we've started planning our wedding, I've heard more sexist comments I've ever heard in my life. Weddings seem to be the last frontier of totally accepted gender stereotypes. We've routinely had people say things like "Well, it's a wedding, I'm sure the groom doesn't know a thing about the plans." or "All the groom wants is to get through the wedding so he can get to the honeymoon." And then there are the condescending things people say just to me. When I was going dress shopping people who found out would say things like, "Well, try not to break the bank. You know you only wear it once." or "Remember, it's just one stupid day. Try to reign in the spending." Right. Because I clearly am not planning a, um, practical wedding.

But I do see how we've gotten here. When you look around the wedding world, it's pretty common to see weddings where it seems clear the groom didn't have a whole lot of say... unless his favorite color is hot pink, and his number one obsession is princesses and kittens. And much of the discussion of grooms tends to be about how to keep them doing what they are told, not how to make sure that the wedding reflects both of you.

I'm lucky to have a really actively involved planning partner. David and I used to run a small theatre company together, so we already know what our complementary strengths are. He does graphic design, builds websites, builds things out of wood, and handles general artistic directorial questions. I run budgets, plan the schedules, manage hiring, and have tons of opinions. (Oh yes, and I write a wedding blog. But don't confuse that with the actual planning!)

I know that we are not the only two people out there planning our wedding as a team. How do other people co-manage the wedding? What do your partners care about and what could they care less about? And how do you both handle the ever present wedding sexism?

Picture: Look how important men are in a wedding! No heads! From here.

**Coming tomorrow - a guest blog on this very same subject from my favorite person, my fiance! Please welcome David with open arms, and lots of comments. He loves comments.**

Heidi & Gerhard's Lighthouse Wedding

If I could only have one lofty goal for this website, it would be that I would help make small and simple weddings fashionable again.

There are a million places publishing the worlds expensive weddings, and the message is clear! If we were willing to spend a $100K on our wedding, we could make it amazing(ly expensive). But today I have another great example of a small, simple, affordable wedding that was everything you could wish for and more.
Heidi and Gerhard got married at the Point Bonita Lighthouse in Sausalito California, which is still a working lighthouse (squeal! hand clapping!) I see this lighthouse everyday from my walk, and I am totally in love with it.
At the very beginning of the service, all 20 guests introducing ourselves to one another, to show that they were there not just as guests, but as a loving community of support for the marriage. Then everyone stood in a semi circle around Heidi & Gerhard, facing the Golden Gate Bridge. Their friend performed the ceremony, and they had a few other friends do readings.
How adorable is this picture? It captures the rustic beauty of the surroundings, and the simple joy of the day. The couple had their friend Emily take the stunning photographs.
After the wedding, everyone went to To in Sausalito for a celebratory meal. The next day, the couple hosted a reception for 70 people at home, with simple food, wine, and lots of swing dancing.
I love simple weddings so much. I love that the focus is on the couple, and the commitment that they are making. I love that they are affordable. And I particularly love that they can take place with little notice in the most beautiful of locations.

See, now, don't you suddenly want to have a simple private ceremony at the courthouse or at your local lighthouse, in your best suit with a clutch of fresh flowers?

I do.

Many thanks to photographer (and reader!) Emily Perello for sending me this wedding. You know how people are always telling you to find a affordable photographer who is just starting out, and is really talented, and you think to yourself, "yeah, I'm so sure that's possible"? Well, Emily is your girl. Northern California couples, go get her! (and tell her your a practical couple).

One Year Ago Today

I'm posting these lovely wedding invitations with images of Brooklyn because we left our home in Brooklyn with a moving van filled will all our earthly belongings exactly one year ago today. It feels like just moments ago, but today I'm overwhelmed with longing for New York, all of our sweet east coast friends, hot summers, Olive Vine Cafe, the subway, Prospect Park, and nights in Park Slope where it seemed like you were in Paris.
And I miss our amazing one week road trip across the country. What should have been a horrible chore was one of the great joys of my life, thanks to David (additional thanks also goes to This American Life, Best Western, my cousin for getting married in the middle of our road trip, our friend Peter in Iowa City house sitting the magic house, our trusty camera, Penske, and my compulsive organization).

So (especially with the dollar sucking the way it is right now) I recommend both New York City and road trips as excellent honeymoon options.

Pictures via Brooklyn Bride