Rose & John's Do-It Together Wedding

This wedding has such a amazing spirit, it shines right through the screen. It was shot by A Beutiful Day Photography, out of Seattle, and took place in the bride's families 100 year old camp in Mendocino California. This wedding speaks to my hippie-kid upbringing in a way that just warms my little soul. For lots of people small church weddings remind them of childhood... but for me, it's weddings with hay-bales.
Everyone helped set up the wedding, and you know how I love that!
Tents! Tents! Tents! I love a wedding with tents. I love communal camping, period.
Yay for friends and family helping with the flowers, that is our plan as well.
And check out the cute feathered wedding dress.
Hay-bales!
You so rarely see a moment of serenity in the middle of a ceremony like this, and its what I hope for most of all on our wedding day.
The party went on long into the night. Any party with a campfire is a good kind of party.
A band on the porch, and a moment in each others arms... what else do you need?

A Sparkly Simple Beach Wedding

The Little White Book has been cranking out the adorable simple weddings of late! Go check this simple North Carolina Beach wedding out. How much do I *love* this BCBG dress as a wedding dress? I heart both BCBG and sparkles... and while their $300 prices are steep for a cocktail dress, they are awesome for a wedding dress.
Photos by Mary Basnight Photography

Indie Engagment Rings

We've been talking a lot about engagement rings of late, from my vintage ring, to my silly plastic ring, and I wanted to do a roundup of some lovely indie rings. Rings are very personal, and from all the stories and comments I've read, it's clear that the intent of the giver and the wearer incredibly important, but this post is about the spirit of the rings themselves. I love my vintage ring for a million reasons, but I love knowing that it carries the story of another woman who wore it for a lifetime before me, and a jeweler who made it by hand. I also love modern rings that were made by hand, and nothing beats supporting independent artists. Keep leaving your ring stories in the comments. I love reading them, and I'm sure I'm not alone.
This simple knotted gold ring is reader Laura's engagement ring, since she didn't want a diamond. She says that everyone she shows it to seems to dislike it, but not me, I'm in love with it.



I also love tear shaped sapphire ring from Conroy + Wilcox which is also made with a diamond.
These rings by Sarah Perlis are lookers, but what I love the best about them is that they are made with rough cut diamonds, which is such a celebration of imperfection.
This ring is also by Sarah Perlis, and it has a classic look to it, while still being unique and simple.
And finally, my friend Lauren's engagement ring, made by conceptual artist Tobias Wong as part of his diamond project. The hidden diamond ring, because "who else should care."

Exactly. The perfect solution to the diamond Olympics.

Winners of the "Why I'm a Practical Bride" Contest

I took me a little longer to pick the winners to the contest then I’d expected because, well, there were 114 entries! You guys blew me away. So, drumroll please, the awards go to:

Desaray, who’s marriage to her partner won’t be legally recognized in DC:
I'm a practical bride because I bought a power of attorney before I bought my shoes.

Cara, of Peonies and Polaroids:
I'm a practical bride because I really and truly hope that our wedding won't be the happiest day of our lives.

Broke-ass Bride:
I'm a practical bride because I believe the day is only 'perfect' if we end up married. To each other.

If the three of you could shoot me a email with your mailing address, your books will go in the mail post-haste.

I had a really hard time picking the winner, so I decided I had to list some runner ups. I don’t have a prize for these entries, except a round of applause:

Courtney:
I'm a practical bride because... I remember no amount of color coordinated ribbon will ever make me as happy as seeing my husband to be at the end of the aisle.

Courtney:
I'm a practical bride because the theme of my wedding is marriage.

Jessica:
I am a practical bride because I have no other choice. Our money's limited, but our love is not.

Monica:
I am a practical bride because I try to stay level-headed, which means not getting competitive, not getting caught up in everything I see on wedding blogs, and not feeling bad about myself for going with more traditional things (cake vs. homemade cupcakes, a church & catering hall vs. outdoors).

Congratulations to all, and a special shout out to the two grooms that entered.

(PS - editors note: looking at this post two years later, it looks like I picked super popular bloggers to win... but the funny thing is none of us where super popular at the time. Just funny writers, I suppose.)

Susan & Cam's Capital Lawn Wedding

You must, must go check out this amazing wedding on The Little White Book. I hesitate to call it a budget wedding, because that would strip away some of it's magical essence. This is the kind of wedding you read about happening 40 years ago, and you sigh, and think "Why can't that happen now?"
The bride wore her mother's veil.
Susan planned the wedding in less then a month. She says it's because she's lazy, I say it's because she's brilliant! This is what she told me about her planning process: "All I knew was that I love both colonial-era style (I have a famous crush on the founding fathers en masse) and the early 1960s. And that I wanted to save all my money for our honeymoon." See? With the awesomeness?
The couple got married in a small ceremony on the capital lawn in Richmond, Virgina... which is free, all you need is a permit.
They took pictures on a walk about town - that were Isweartogod based on old movie stills.
See, this the the way to toss the bouquet - silly style to your best friend.
The evening ended with a family dinner at a formal restaurant.
And by popular demand, they had a big party with all their friends to celebrate a week before the wedding. (Don't you just want to hug them?)

And while you are there, you must check out The Little White Book. This is her maid of honor's wedding, so you know she's good people!

The Plastic Ring Romp

I walked into my local card store the other day only to be met by a wall of blingy fake engagement rings. What on earth are they doing selling fake engagement rings? Yes, David almost proposed to me with a tacky fake engagement ring - for more hilarity, and to let me pick the real ring myself - but surely the fake engagement ring can't be a common proposal strategy? Or maybe America is more hilarious then I thought? Anyway. Of course the first thing that flashed across my mind was "I must try one on, immediately."

So, there I was, in the card store, slipping a fake engagement ring the size of a small softball on my hand. "AHHH!" I said (perhaps a little loudly) and the sales lady whipped around, eyebrows raised. "Oh," I said, giggling apologetically, "It's just that these rings are crazy funny! I mean look at the size? Silly, right?"

Judging from her reaction, I'm guessing that the rings are not humorous.
So, of course, I bought it.

A Response To The New York Times Botox & Bridesmaids

Quite a number of people have sent me the New York Times article last week about the new breed of demanding brides – brides that demand botox, teeth whitening, and identical spray tans from their bridesmaids. Thank you all. It’s an interesting read. But, my response to this article might not be quite what everyone is expecting.

Here is the deal: I actually do not think that women are this crazy. Yes, yes, of course, there are some demanding Upper East Side women who demand botox of their bridesmaids, but for goodness sake, these people probably make their doormen walk their dogs. And as much as I love the New York Times, they know how to write shocking copy and to spin weird New York occurrences into trends taking the nation by storm. Everyone has a story about a bride who made all her bridesmaids wear horrible poofy orange dresses that cost a thousand dollars, and then screamed at them for the whole wedding – those women are out there. But there is something else that is out there too, and that is the ever-growing Bridezilla myth that stalks the land.

I’ve gone on record as saying I hate the word Bridezilla, and I’m going to do it again. The term Bridezilla is an offensive, anti-feminist, throwback. I think that as weddings have grown ever more elaborate, self-centered, and out of control, we’ve developed the myth of the Bridezilla to dump the problem on. Brides are not dashing about behaving like nincompoops because they are unstable and narcissistic, as a rule. Brides are dashing about in a frenzy because the ever bigger empire of weddings is stressing people out, and giving people a new impossible target to try to hit. How can you skip the aisle runner and the ornate table arrangements (and the perfectly botoxed skin) if you feel like everyone is going to judge you on it? Women feel like now they not only have to have the perfect job, and the perfect fiancé, they have to have the perfect wedding.

So – my attack on this problem has been two fold. One, I realized really quickly that I needed to be really vague when people asked me about my wedding. The minute I’m introduced as the fiancé, people turn to me and say “Oh, when is the big DAY? How is the planning? Are you stressed out?” The answer is “It’s next year, it’s going really well, and no I’m fine. Can I have a drink?” And two, I started this website, to try to perpetuate healthier wedding goals for myself. A few months later, it turns out I’m not alone. Thank you all for helping me to feel so whole-heartedly that most people planning weddings are sane and delightful.

As for the New York Times, now that they’ve found all the women in the country who are botoxing their bridesmaids, perhaps they should find all the women in the country who are working full time, planning a lovely low-stress wedding, and involving their partners in the planning? I suspect you’ll find there are more of us then them.

San Francisco Budget Wedding Ideas

I have lots of ideas for San Francisco weddings on a budget, and, well, I'm only having one wedding. So, it occurred to me that I could *share* my bright ideas, and then maybe, if I'm very lucky, someone will steal my idea, implement it beautifully, and then send me the pictures. Deal? Deal!

I have two ideas that I've been dreaming about. Both of them involve a small personal ceremony, a reception for 50-60 people, quite a bit of wine, and between $6,000-$7,000 dollars for the whole shebang (in San Francisco dollars, that's something of a steal).

Idea #1
Have a small personal ceremony on telegraph hill. You could get married right by Coit Tower, or in San Francisco's hidden wonderland - the Filbert Street Steps.
That evening, around 8pm, have a small cocktail reception at my favorite wine bar in the city - Hotel Biron. It's dark, moody, and sophisticated all at once. Last time we were there we discovered you could rent it out for the whole evening for $5,000, and that includes high quality wine and tasting plates. Mmmm... if you do this, you should invite me.
Wear a sophisticated cocktail dress, and of course, killer shoes.

Idea #2
Have a small personal ceremony in the most beautiful building in San Francisco - City Hall.
Then at 5pm, rent out one of my favorite cafes in the city, Nook, on Nob Hill. Cable cars will go by both windows of the restaurant, and the sun, or fog, will stream through the leafy trees. You'll serve simple appetizers and sandwiches, wine, and good coffee.
Wear a outfit reminiscent of a 1940's wedding suit, a feather fascinator in your hair, and killer shoes, natch.

Photos: Filbert Street Steps via Flickr, Hotel Biron via, City Hall via Flickr, Nook via Yelp, and outfit by the talented Emily at Emily Style.

Wedding Polaroid Love

I got Jenifer Altman's book For The Love of Light: A Tribute To the Art of Polaroid today. It was such a wonderful bit of beauty flitting across my desk. Another delightful book from a talented blogger, hooray! Anyway, it's official, we have to have some Polaroids taken at the wedding (even though they are, sadly, about to disappear.)

Photo by Aubrey Trinnaman via {Frolic!}

Save The Date - Family Photos?

We've had the idea for our wedding invitations since more or less the second that we got engaged (I will share more about them one day) and thanks to David's graphic design skills we've had them actually designed on paper for a month now. The thing is, the paper goods that we should have designed first were, um, the Save The Dates. So I'm starting to get cracking on ideas.

These two invitations using old family pictures and screen printing/ custom stamping have really captured my imagination.
This one was by Jordon, of Oh Happy Day.
And this one is by Liz of Linda & Harriett, via {Frolic!}

I'm now pondering what we could do with old family wedding photos, custom stamps, and a picture of us. I love the idea of using a invite to tie us to family history and tradition. I'll keep you posted at this idea develops...

You should also check out this great idea for using family photos to create a guest book on the new blog {cypress and oak}.

Submitting Your Practical Wedding

So, wedding season is upon us, and I know that lots and lots of readers are making a dash down the aisle this summer. Once you get back from your honeymoons, or just relax after all the excitement, I would love if you would consider submitting your wedding to be featured on this blog.

How do you know if your wedding is practical? Well, first off, if you read and enjoy this blog, it probably is. I have said it before, and I will say it again, there are no specific budget limitations that qualify you for having a practical wedding. Budgets are all relative, depending on where you live, how many guests you have, and what kind of resources you have, and the last thing I want is to give brides some other benchmark to live up to. Remember: the ideal* of a practical wedding is one that doesn't make you broke, and doesn't stress you out. Enough said.

To submit your wedding, email me (meg at apracticalwedding dot com):

• 10-15(ish) pictures of your wedding
• Your first names
• Where your wedding was held
• What made your wedding creative
• What made your wedding thrifty (whatever that meant for you)
  
• What made your wedding sane
  
• If you have more of your wedding pictures online, and you'd like to share them, email me the link

I can't share every wedding that's submitted to me, but I love reading about every single one. I can't wait to see what kinds of weddings you are planning.

*Note: this is just a ideal. Obviously all weddings stress you out a little bit, and make you a little broke. But, they are good goals to keep in mind, no?

Vintage Wedding Dress Inspiration

So, real life has been a little exhausting of late, which means that my pithiness and sass are running a little low. So, I thought I'd share with you one of the things that are inspiring me right now. These dresses, from Priscilla's of Boston, are not the most affordable, but it's the styling that I love, and the inspiration is free. I'm loving their simple vintage feel. (And if you want to cheer my weekend, leave me something that's inspiring you in the comments.)



Thanks to C(oi)n:Purse for the heads up.

Simple Huppah Inspiration

I've been meaning to write a post about huppah inspiration, and I've finally gathered the pictures to do it! Hooray! Most huppahs (huppot, really, in the plural) these days are very decorated, and I wanted to pull together some pictures of simple, graceful, lovely huppahs.

For all of you non-Jews out there, a huppah is one of the key elements of a Jewish wedding. It's not just a pretty wedding canopy, it represents (among other things) the home of the newlyweds, open on the sides to the couples community, family, and freinds. In it's original form, a huppah was a prayer shawl held up by four poles, each supported by a friend or loved one. It's most traditional for a Jewish wedding to take place outside, with just the huppah and the sky as a covering.
One of the first things David and I decided about the wedding is that we wanted a simple, traditional huppah. For us, this canopy serves as a religious symbol, and we wanted it to be made of a prayer shawl.
Our wedding is going to be outside, and we knew we wanted a natural look, and this photo from Belathee Photography set my little heart on fire. We have to figure out how to get long sapling branches to make our huppah!
Now we just have to decide if we want a free standing huppah (more practical) or a hand held huppah. I love the image of the canopy being carried down the aisle by the wedding party, which is making me lean towards handheld.
Pictures from: Twin Lens Studio, Martha Stewart Weddings, Belathee Photography, Marla Aufmuth via Snippet and Ink, and Jocelyn Filley.

Beck and Margaux's Quasi-nuptuals

I know I've been saying "blah, blah, blah Our Labor of Love Photography" of late, but I can not help myself. They shoot such amazing weddings. And how could I not share this with you. The wedding took place at Union Station in LA, the very place I would want to have a luxe wedding, if I were having one. History, style, urban chic, all rolled into one.
Beck & Margaux sent this description out in their invitations:
"after hours of rhetorical wrangling and wrestling, we remain uncomfortable with nearly all of the language commonly used to describe these kind of events. none of the usual choices accurately describe our relationship as we imagine it. 'marriage' suggests a state-sanctioned institution (and it makes margaux feel extremely queasy). 'commitment ceremony' has become nearly as institutional in tone (and it makes beck think of sterile medical facilities). we cannot say that we are simply 'celebrating our love,' since we intend this event to create something as much as it describes something already existing. So, in the absence of any acceptable language, we chose simply to call this event 'the twenty-first day of the month,' a title which, as luck would have it, also marks the anniversary of our first date."
And then in the middle of the party they announced that, they had gotten married after all!
Hooray! And Hooray for California!
Plus, there were hula hoops! Ahhh!!!
I'm only showing you a few pictures, because you need to go check out the whole story here.

Contest Ends Tonight

Whew! Well, color me overwhelmed by your response to the why I'm a practical bride contest. I'm still open to practical groom entries, but it's looking like practical grooms don't read my little blog. (small sigh). You've got the rest of today to enter. Hint: short and sweet will probably take the cake. I'll post the winners next week. Good luck. Now go get sassy.

(Update: 114 comments? Goodness! Yay Team Practical.)

Wedding Awesomeness Elsewhere: The Cake Solution

Sometimes you discover a new blog, and the day brightens. Well, today is that kind of day. I bring you Lefthanded-Rightminded and the wedding cake solution:

Problem: wedding cake

Every bride-to-be says these words: "Groom-to-be and I tasted our wedding cake last week and it is the best cake we've ever had." When I was a child and thought like a child, I took the happy couple at their word. Now that I am an adult, I realize that wedding cake is actually the worst cake in the world. While the bride and groom taste freshly baked mini cakes, wedding cake is actually baked days before the wedding, and it is made in bulk. Anyone who has ever tried to turn spaghetti for four into spaghetti for forty knows that a multiplied recipe never tastes as good as the original, even when the math is done correctly.

Solution: Leighton's shawarma cake

Since the best cake in the world is obviously Pillsbury's Moist Supreme Funfetti cake with Betty Crocker's Rainbow Chip frosting, but since it would look sloppy to have a table at the reception covered in homemade cakes, I have decided that the ideal way to serve this to a large crowd would be in the style of the shawarma: bake twenty Funfetti cakes, pile them on a vertical spit, ice the tower of cakes, and then hire someone with a machete to shave off slices.

When this takes off, I would like you to remember where you first read about it.

Now go enjoy her blog.
Thanks Lauren for the tip. Photo via Flickr.

The Goal (Neatly Illustrated)

It's strange how weddings have the tendency to bring out the best and the worst in people. We all know about the best: the joy, the generosity, and the love. But I've found out that, at least for me, weddings can sometimes bring out the worst, even if it's in a small quiet way. How many times have you looked at pictures of a big luxe wedding and felt a nagging bit of jealousy? Why can't you afford those shoes or that dress, or that photo booth? How many times has your budget made you feel isolated or sad because it's not as big and fabulous as so-and-so's? And that's not even mentioning the wonderful stress induced behavior that wedding planning brings out in each of us.

But, what I really want to talk about is the competitiveness that weddings can bring out in even the sanest of brides. When I started this blog I cited Ariel's "Your Wedding Is Not A Contest" post as some of the best wedding advice I'd heard. Now 168 (!) wedding posts later, I think this is even better advice. Those of us who are trying to plan a wedding our own way spend so much time and energy fighting conventions and the wedding industry, that it's only natural that our defenses go up. "I'm having the greenest wedding ever!" we say. "My wedding is going to be the most amazing tiny budget wedding of all time," or "Everything about my wedding is going to buck tradition."

While all these goals are worth being proud of, sometimes we need to take a step back, and realize that's not the point. As awesome as our line-item budget skills are, the point isn't coming in 20% below the budget. The point isn't even to make our wedding totally unique and personal. Nope, the point is to plan a wedding that's the best wedding for us. The point is to find a good balance between not going broke and staying sane.

The real point is to end up married. And it's good to remember that we all have the same goal.

So next time you catch yourself thinking, "Our wedding is going to be totally unique!" or "Our wedding is going to be the thriftiest wedding ever." Stop, and think, "Hey, at the end of my wedding, I'm going to end up married!"

Now if I can only stop my wedding related guilt (but that's another post).

Photo via Our Labor Of Love.

Meighan & Seth's Fort Tyron Park Wedding

So there I was, sitting at the Sunday breakfast table, reading the New York Times, and pondering my first post of the week, and bam! I flipped to the "Vows" column and the subtitle was "When it comes to planning a wedding in just three weeks in Fort Tyron Park, who do you call? Yourselves." Ah-ha! I thought to myself, a practical wedding, and in one of my favorite places.Meighan and Seth met working for The One Campaign, the antipoverty group founded by Bono. She was Christian, he was Jewish, they were co-workers, and yet, they couldn't stop themselves from falling in love. He proposed in Buenos Areas, and two years later, with their hectic work schedules, they still hadn't planned a wedding. So they made some phone calls, and suddenly they had a wedding date in just three weeks at the New Leaf Cafe in that oasis in Manhattan, Fort Tyron Park. (Which goes to show you, you can slack from now till three weeks before your wedding date!) And to be honest, this paragraph made me tear up:

The sky over the Hudson threatened to drench the bride’s Jenny Yoo gown — but held off for the couple, who, under a bower of lindens, melded Christian and Jewish traditions. Mr. Hickson, their officiant, welcomed the couple to the “room that God has created for you.” Then, as a blaze of orange broke through the cloud cover, a handful of guests erected a simple wedding canopy over the couple. Standing beneath it with his bride, the air crackled with the sound of Mr. Amgott stamping on a glass.

The pictures of this wedding are so lovely! Read all about it here.