The Wedding Graduates

I’ve mentioned before, when we first started planning our wedding, I had a hard time finding wedding planning resources that were a great fit for our needs. So, I was over the moon when I started blogging and started meeting smart, savvy, thrifty women who were planning weddings who had amazing style and a sense of humor. Some of these ladies were bloggers and some of them were readers that I got to know through long late night emails.

So, it was with some anxiety that at the end of July I realized that 90% of my new-found internet wedding support group was getting married. In August. Of this year. And here I was, not getting married until next August. What was I going to do? Suddenly I was going to be all alone in wedding land again. I’d noticed that in the indie Wedding world, people often find the wedding planning process so draining, that once their wedding is done, they never talk about it again. I was convinced I was going to be savvy-wedding-posse-less.

Then, the weddings of internet friends started happening, and I started hearing quick stories, tips, and yes, seeing pictures. I realized that far from being all alone in the wedding world, I now had friends and allies with real life indie wedding experience. They knew something magical that I didn’t know yet. They had gone through the transformative process and come out the other side.

I wanted to hear more from these newly married women, and I thought you might to. So, a new Practical Wedding series was born: The Wedding Graduates. Over the next two weeks some fabulous woman (and one man, hooray!) are going to guest blog about what they learned from their wedding. I can’t wait to hear what they have to say.

Professional Photography Alternatives

This week a reader emailed me and pointed out that a lot of the weddings I feature have gorgeous professional photography, and that I have a lot of photographers as sponsors. This is true. I admit to being a sucker for beautiful photography, and having a soft spot in my heart for indie photographers as wedding elves*. However, writing with a eye to the practical, I'm well aware that not every couple can afford, or wants to pay for, pro-photography. Lots of the weddings that I've featured have gotten photography for free, from a pro or semi-pro friend or family member, and I think that's great. In fact, inevitably, some of the coolest weddings I receive are ones where a pro-photographer shot their best friends wedding for free - like Ember and Ben, or Kate and Colemine. That said, not everyone had a talented photographer friend. So! I can only blog about weddings people send me, so I would love for readers to email me weddings where the pictures were taken by family and friends, and stories of not using a professional photographer, and other tales of photo mischief.

When I asked for stories about affordable wedding dresses, you all blew me out of the water, and we ended up with the tale of the great wedding dress hack. So, team practical, what have you got in the way of photography hacks? Email me your stories, and leave your tips in the comments.

*Full disclosure: before I found a pack of indie photographers, I was in photographer hell. I've gone to weddings that were ruined with a photographer screaming orders "Cut the cake now! Kiss the bride!" I've interviewed photographers that came complete with scary generic shot lists. This is why I have been so excited to find photographers of the wedding elf breed.

Beth & Chris' Simple Orcas Island Wedding

This wedding, shot by Seattle photographer Jenny Jimenez has such an amazing simplicity to it. I'm so inspired by this wedding, because it seems that the couple stripped all the excess away, leaving a pure and simple ceremony, expressing love and joy and family. And on top of that, it features stellar scenery (who would ever need wedding decorations again, if we all got married in amazing natural places like this), found art sculpture, and a dress so amazing I would steal it out of the pictures and wear it myself if I could.
Beth and Chris planned their wedding while living halfway around the world in Mumbai, India. Beth had her dress made for her in India, and I think it might be the most beautiful wedding dress I've ever seen. Simple, somewhat traditional, but made of a easy relaxed fabric.
The wedding took place on family property on Orcas Island, where Chris's grandfather had collected items and made them into found art.

Is there anything more we could as for on our wedding day then to climb through nature, barefoot, with our beloved? Since we are also getting married in nature, I intend to be doing some of this myself.
The bride was walked down the aisle by both of her parents, a Jewish tradition that I love. And look how much they are all enjoying each others company!
I've showed you their chuppah before. So simple and so beautiful.
The ceremony site featured some of Chris' grandfathers found art, three concrete circles overlooking the water.
I love pictures of couples laughing and enjoying each other during the ceremony.
The wedding pictures that I love the most are always these pictures of the couple, after the ceremony, giddy with the joy of it all.
And ok... this picture, with the vintage umbrellas... Oh. My. God. Best wedding party ever.
The evening ended with some dancing in the barn.
And a huge hora outside. Hurrah!

A big congratulations to Beth and Chris! And a huge thank you to Jenny Jimenez for sharing this wedding with me. You should go check out much more of this wedding on her blog.

A Toast To Jacob And Megan

I'm in Baltimore for a few days for my future brother-in-law's marriage. I wanted to raise a toast to Jacob and Megan and wish them a sunshiny, joyful, love-filled day on Saturday, and many happy years together. I'm so glad you'll be part of my family.

In honor of their wedding which is the first Jewish (or interfaith Jewish) wedding I've ever attended (really), I thought I'd post one of the most gorgeous Jewish weddings I've yet to set eyes on. More from the above wedding, shot by Jenny Jimenez, up next.

Shana Tova

I am unplugged tomorrow for Yom Kippur. To all my Jewish readers - may you have a peaceful and reflective day, and a sweet new year. I'll see you all back here on Friday.

Tiffany & Ethan's Forest Picnic Wedding

I've been all a-twitter about picnic weddings of late, but this picnic wedding has just about everything you need - a thrifty couple, a forest, adorable babies... what else do you need? This magical forest bash was shot by sponsor Kate Harrison, and the bride is a reader of the blog (which is a pretty exciting combination for me!)
The wedding took place at the affordable and beautiful Corralitos Community Center nestled at the foot of the Santa Cruz Mountains. (Bay Area brides - I suggest you check this location out! I wish we'd known about it.)
This from the bride: I truly found each project that I took on (i.e. 200+ paper flowers, homemade invitations, favors and banners, labeling wine bottles, etc) to be calming and it gave my creative side a chance to come out. I work in an office 40+ hours a day where that side of me is stifled and our wedding was the perfect outlet for me. I had lots of help from friends who truly wanted to help with the projects, they really were fun. Having a day-of coordinator was a complete blessing too, I highly recommend that. The store - Paper Source - became an addictive source of inspiration. I started the whole planning process with the invitations that my husband helped me design. My color theme came from the paper I chose for the invitations, it was the paper that made the whole thing come together so nicely for me!
Every wedding is better with a jam session! The couple hired local folk band The Farmers Market String Band to play for the reception.

The couple hired a local chef to make organic and sustainable picnic lunches for everyone with finger sandwiches, nuts, and chocolate molten cake. Other then that, they used reusable and recyclable materials, tried to keep vendors to a minimum, and had family and friends help with set up and tear down.
And here is the thing, when you have babies that are this delighted to be at your wedding (click to see the picture even bigger, because this child is so amused) you have done something right.
The bride and groom shared a picnic blanket (aww) and hung out with their family, friends, local folk band, and adorable babies. I'm not sure it gets any better than this!

Congratulations to Tiffany & Ethan, here is to many happy years!

All photos by practical sponsor Kate Harrison

Sponsor Introduction: Kate Harrison Photography

There is nothing that delights me more then when vendors email me to tell me that they love working with low key, practical, DIY couples. It's so rare and it's so fantastic! My newest sponsor, Northern California photographer Kate Harrison is one of those amazing wedding elves. In her words: “I am low-key and go with the flow kind of photographer. I like to be a fly on the wall at weddings, capturing the real deal. My style is artistic photojournalism so half of me loves the moment when an image is captured and the other half loves the process of making it art afterward in my studio. I love photographs that give people a sense of texture, mood, reality, passion and love.” Hear, hear!

And the images… the images… her work is dreamy. Next up, a wedding shot by Kate Harrison that happens to be one hip, laid back, thrifty bash. If you love it half as much as I do, it will make your morning a bit happier.

Get Rich Slowly Feature

Wow... a big thank you to reader Rebecca who dropped me a line to let me know that A Practical Wedding was featured on the excellent finance blog Get Rich Slowly. Since personal finance is more of a passion for me than weddings, this was really a honor. The made my day quote?

“It is unlikely that you will ever hear me utter these words again about a wedding-related site, but I could read A Practical Wedding for hours.”

Awwwwww..... and thank you. I'm really sort of in shock over here!

Tracy & Leslie's San Francisco City Hall Wedding

Remember way back when when I told you that photographer Jessamyn Harris was doing a same sex photography give away, in honor of California's Supreme Court Ruling? Well, she did, and the pictures are in! I give you Tracy & Leslie's wedding. I'm not sure I need to even say much about this wedding, because as I was blogging about it, the pictures made me cry. Watching triumphs like these is such a clear reminder of why marriage is important, and why we are all getting married in the first place.





Next time wedding planning is stressing you out, and you're worrying about how the napkins should be folded at the reception, come back to this wedding for a moment. It will remind you why we are choosing to celebrate our marriages, and what love and family mean.

A huge congratulations to Tracy and Leslie. I know your lives together have already been filled with years of joy, but as you embark on this new stage of life together, I wish years of love, happiness, and understanding. Check out much more of the wedding over here.

Small Wedding Sass

I love this quote from this amazing conceptual invite suite for a in-home wedding featured by Oh So Beautiful Paper:

"The wedding was very much like other weddings, where the parties have no taste for finery or parade, and Mrs. Elton, from the particulars detailed by her husband thought it all extremely shabby, and very inferior to her own. "Very little white satin, very few lace veils; a most pitiful business." But, in spite of these deficiencies, the wishes, the hopes, the predictions, the confidences of the small band of true friends who witnessed the ceremony were fully answered in the perfect happiness of the union." - Jane Austen, from Emma

Sigh. It makes me want to have a small wedding at home.

Now, I know Oscar Wilde* must have written something almost as eloquent and twice as clever about weddings, if I can just lay my hands on it....

**Update! This is the invitation for Emma in the previous post. I had no idea! How cool!**

You must go see the invite suite, found via the excellent Cevd at Pretty Pretty Paper
* Because if you think about it, I'm sure it's obvious that I love Oscar Wilde's writing. I've even lipstick-kissed his grave in Paris.

Wedding Morning Glee

I found this picture of bride Emma rocking her ban.do headband, and doing a little pre-wedding teeth brushing via A Cup of Jo.

This is it! This is how I want to look the morning before my wedding. This is how I want to feel. I don't want a thousand people primping me. I don't want a gown that takes five people to get me into. I don't want to be thinking about if the programs came out right, or if the centerpieces have wilted. Eff the centerpieces! I just want to be rocking out, giddy, excited, happy, and brushing my little teeth. And David will have to document it for you, because to save money on the wedding photography front, I decided we did not need pro-shots of me in my skivvys.

Jewish Wedding Music - Kugelplex!

You know how everyone has something they would happily blow their whole budget on? Rob a 7-11 to afford? Panhandle on the street to get cash to pay for? Well, I'm sure you already know that for me that splurge would not be a Vera Wang.... No, it would be an amazing hip klezmer band like the bay area's Kugelplex.
And yes, I would hope the fiddler would wear a feather boa to our par-tay. And no, I wouldn't feel guilty about that expenditure for a red hot second. Putting food in amazing musicians mouths? Well, that's reason enough to live as far as I'm concerned.
If you want a definition of what kind of party is my kind of party, just look at the picture above. Watch out world. I'm pretty determined when I put my mind to things. Thinking cap, officially on. Now in the meantime, you need to go watch this video of Kugelplex rocking out. Seriously, go watch. It will improve your day.

(I found Kugleplex via Jessamyn Harris.)

Patty & Trent's DIY Picnic Wedding

This fantastic picnic wedding was shot by practical sponsor Keira Lemonis. I love featuring picnic weddings because, well, I love picnics. They are fun, laid back, and affordable to throw. (And did I mention, fun?) So mixing picnics with the overblown world o' weddings seems like the perfect antidote. How can you talk your wedding super seriously if you have a "head picnic blanket" instead of a head table? My favorite parts of Patty & Trent's wedding are that they had a pot-luck dessert buffet, let people bring their dogs, and had had dog treats at the dessert buffet! Awwww....
In the end, the pictures from weddings I love best are always these - the un-posed, un-rehearsed, un-planned moments, filled with joy and emotion.

There were picnic baskets filled with fresh fruit on every picnic table, a clothes line with pictures, bocce and horseshoes, hay bails, a lemonade stand, a wishing well.
And dancing! You can have a picnic wedding and still have plenty of dancing.
There was a playground right next to the wedding "venue" (achem, a park, yay) with a playground. Fun for the kids! Fun for the bride and groom! Just fun!
And... if you didn't already love this wedding because of the puppies and the swing set and the pot-luck... you should love it because the groom made his own boutonnière. Hurrah for gender fearless grooms!

Sponsor Introduction: Keira Lemonis Photography

I’m pleased to introduce our newest sponsor Keira Lemonis Photography. Keira reached out to me to be a sponsor because she particularly loves working with practical brides, which is always so good to hear. Her pictures are fantastic, and she is all about showcasing your wedding glee (do we dare say relaxed wedding glee? Yeah, we do.) And the best part? She has fantastic rates. Keira is located in New York State, but she travels (affordably) which is often the best way to get a photographer that gels with your style. Next up, a fabulous real wedding shot by our own Keira Lemonis.

Simple Table Settings

In my last post I mentioned that thinking about table settings was fun for me. So, here we go. (and I hear you with the *yawn* on the table settings. It's fine, come back tomorrow).

I called this post 'Simple Table Settings,' which was just a nice way to say 'Lazy Table Settings.' I live in awe of you crazy-crafty super DIY brides. You guys say "I'm going to knit all of my napkins." And I think "Amazing!!!” and “I'm tired just thinking about that project. Oh, I better go take a nap." By which I mean to say, it's good I like simple, because I’m clearly not going to hand embroider my linens.
So, this brings us to the dilemma of table settings. I muttered to our caterer something about us using jewel tones when going through her rental linens book, and she snapped to, pulled the book away and said firmly "I would not recommend using cotton-poly to make a fashion statement." Right. That said, we’re not much for pricey upgrades. So for a while there I was pondering making table runners… which still a option, but err, pulling out the sewing machine just seems like a lot of work. Which is how I fell for this lovely table where they used the folded the napkins to provide the pop of color. THIS, I thought to myself, THIS I can do! (or, uh, ask the caterer to do.)
Then there was this sweet and simple table setting. We've been thinking we'd do long tables but this picture makes me like the good old fashioned round table.
And, I don't know if we'll have menu cards, as they seem like a lot of hassle for something people look at for two seconds. But if we did have them (our big investment in the wedding is the food, so it might be nice to highlight our quirky and local food choices) I'd want them to look much like this one, designed by the excellent Pretty Pretty Paper. Simple, simple, simple. And chic.

See, I like details too. I just take the extremely low stress approach to them. So low stress that sometimes I actually *achem* fall asleep.

First picture from Snippet & Ink, via Emily Style; Second picture from Brooklyn Bride

My Wedding Planning Vow

I haven't written much about our wedding of late, so I thought you all were due for a update:

We're done planning.

Orrr... that is what we are telling people when they ask (I think I've mentioned I don't talk much about the wedding in real life?) We've booked our big three: our venue, our photographer, and our caterer, wedding elves all. As for the other major details, we are well on our way - David's parents found him a suit on sale, I seem to have found a dress, we did a dry run on the flowers, our rabbi has the date on her calender, we've settled on a welcome picnic, and we designed our invitations and save the dates. Phew. That feels like a lot when I write it all out. So, we're in good shape, given that we are a whole 10 months away from the wedding.

Since my hyper efficient overdrive has given us breathing room I've made the following vow to myself: From here on out, I will not worry about things unless they are meaningful, fun, or really useful. I don't want to spend time thinking about the color of the bridesmaids dresses (not fun for me), I want to spend time writing the wedding service. I do want to think a bit about chic and easy table settings (fun!), but I want to spend far more time enjoying the process of pre-marital counseling with our rabbi.

So, that's my vow to myself. I'm sure I'll have a hard time keeping it, but I figure having made it to the internet will help keep me honest. Does anyone want to join me in making a wedding vow? What parts of the planning process feel really meaningful to you?

And PS - I'm not going to vow not to stress about money. I don't like to set myself up for failure. Sigh.

Picture by Our Labor Of Love (because wedding planning should be lots of fun, no?)

Emmy & Kirk's Creative Laid Back Wedding

Every so often I get a wedding that I get so excited about that it makes my little toes wiggle with excitement when I post it. This reader wedding is without a doubt one of those. So, without further ado, I bring you Emmy & Kirk's wedding at Larkspur Farm, Mount Vernon, WA. Hold on to your hats, this is a big post!

What made your wedding creative?
We tried to highlight things that we already love. For us some of those things are letterpress printing, fresh flowers, typewriters, having fun outdoors, photography and music: I took a stab at letterpress printing by enrolling in a great class at the School of Visual Concepts and came out with some lovely invitations. I love fresh flowers and try to keep a bouquet in the apartment, year round.
My belles (that's what I called my dear gals who stood up with me) and I made our bouquets the night before the wedding. My mom, aunt, nieces and sister-in-law made the boutonnière's.
I made paper flags on barbeque skewers and used them as place markers for the ceremony. The idea was for them to stand in the place that the flag was and pick it up. One side read: Stand Here. Hold Me. The other side had our names and wedding date on it. Guests waved them after the kiss. Later a few guests also wore them in their hair.We collect vintage Olivetti-Underwood typewriters so we used one of them as our guestbook. We provided large index cards for folks to type on and my dad made a box out of dark walnut that we used as a rolodex to file them.
We did not predict how much the children would love typing. Most of them had never used a typewriter before and we received some sweet, hilarious notes.
My husband is in a band. Several of the guys from his band and another friend are in a bluegrass band called the Half Brothers. They played the Pixie's 'Here Comes Your Man' as the gentlemen walked in. Then Kirk sang me down the aisle to 'The Way I Feel Inside' by The Zombies. That was a wonderful moment for me, walking towards the man I love as he sang soft and sweet just to me.

What made your wedding thrifty (whatever that meant for you)?
So many things…. Doing most of it ourselves and keeping the guest list small was the most significant way we kept costs down and the merriment up. My best friend and belle of the ball made our cakes.
We asked a good friend to be our preacher man. Together we wrote a simple, short, ceremony. We hired the resident photographer of Kirk's band to take photos.
Larkspur Farm has the most beautiful gardens so we played up the natural beauty of the place and took the minimalist route on decorations. We skipped the DJ and made an old soul playlist along with fun dance songs we solicited from our guests. Vintage rings kept things thrifty too. I was lucky to have the opportunity to use my grandmother's engagement ring and wedding band set. I didn't even consider dresses that cost a fortune and easily found a beautiful, comfortable and relatively inexpensive dress.
What made your wedding sane?
Just reminding ourselves of what we stand for – adventure, commitment, friendship, fun, honesty, patience, trust, respect, love and teamwork – was enough to make us sane and even relaxed when things got hectic. Our awesome friends who lent both their hands to make the day fun. Our generous and helpful families who let our vision reign. And our truly fantastic caterers, Jessica and Mataio of Ciao Thyme, who kept the day running smoothly and served the most phenomenal (local and organic) food ever.
I love this wedding! I love everything about it. I love the typewriters, the earnestly typing kids, the band, the dress, the flowers, all of it. But more then anything I love the laid back and joyful feeling of the day. I'm leaving you with this picture of the bride relaxing and chatting, because this is what I want for each of us on our wedding day, to have a day we truly enjoy, and to spend time with the people we love as we mark a important milestone. Congratulations Emmy & Kirk, and cheers to you!